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 Just Sex

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Just Sex

"Is it possible to have purely sexual relationship without any feelings being involved?"

Some people are just not looking for love or a long-lasting relationship; sex serves as a momentary thrill or satisfaction of an emotional or physical need. If both people feel the same way (and practice safe sex), no one gets hurt (like in the trend these days for "buddy sex," in which friends have sex but agree not to be committed to each other).

While such arrangements are possible when both people feel the same way, many people think they can pull if off only to discover that they really expect more or end up feeling more than they thought they would. Just as you should spell out your intentions about wanting to wait before becoming intimate, be equally clear if you go out with someone with the hope of having sex (and not much else). Say something like, "I'm not looking for a commitment, so please don't feel hurt if I don't end up calling you or giving you what you want. Sex may not mean as much  to me as it does to you." This is a bit cold, but it's certainly a fair alert.

I hope you come to see that the best sex is in the context of a loving, committed relationship. but if not, before you engage in an act that for you is devoid of feeling, consider not only your intentions, but also your partner's feelings. my suggestion is if you don't feel anything for the person you are sleeping with, but you know that person has feelings for you, move on before you cause a lot of heartache.

The best sex merges the physical act with an emotional and spiritual attachment. As one man I know put it, "She's the paint, I'm the brush, and the bed is our canvas, to create our beautiful painting of love.


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