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EXERCISES TO HELP YOU BUILD
SELF-ESTEEM
Self-Pump (Instead of Self-Dump)
Whenever you feel down or afraid to approach someone for a date, remind
yourself of all your wonderful qualities. If you tend to focus on the negative
("I'm too short and chunky," "My nose is too big," I stutter
when I'm nervous"), refocus your energy on the positive.
What happens when you constantly criticize yourself? People will eventually
believe you. After all, who knows you better than you? Often we say negative
things about ourselves as a kind of protection, to minimize other people' expectations,
or to deflect their jealousy. Avoid this trap. Instead, tell others all the
terrific things about yourself, what you do, what to know, and what you can do
for them.
Affirmations
Affirmations are a form of positive self-talk. The rule on affirmations is to
start your self-affirming statement with "I am" (not "Other
people say I am . . . "). Don't start with a negative, such as "I am
not fat, sloppy, or boring." When the word "not" is attached to a
statement, the mind conjures up the negative images (of fat, sloppy, and boring)
anyway. It's like being told, " Don't think about a pink elephant."
What's the first thing that comes to mind? A pink elephant, of course. Resist
putting thoughts in your head that you don't want your mind to latch on to.
Instead, put only those thoughts in your head you want your mind to remember.
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