|
Dealing with Rejection: The Nine Phases
If you are the one who is being dumped, be prepared for the
"stages" of rejection. While the pain may be awful, each stage is part
of the healing process. The stages generally follow the sequence described in
the following bulleted list, but the steps can alternate with each other.
Dealing with rejection is a lot like dealing with other kinds of loss, and the
stages are similar:
THE DENIAL PHASE: "This can't be happening." During this
stage you may find yourself waiting for the phone to ring, not believing that
the relationship is actually over.
SOLUTION: Acknowledge reality and acknowledge your feelings about it. Accept
but do not dwell on shame and embarrassment, and all the "shoulda/woulda/coulda's"
(I should have known better," "I could have been sexier").
THE BARGAINING PHASE: Driving yourself crazy, thinking that "If I
get my hair cut," or "If I just let him have sex more often," or
"If I don't call her for a week," he will change his mind.
SOLUTION: There's only one solution: Accept that it's over.
Next>>
|
